Lookie what arrived in my inbox this morning. Apparently Papa John’s gives out a free topping for every touchdown scored in the Maryland game from the previous weekend. And if they win, the toppings double. So after winning 51-24, well…er, that’s a lot of math.
Good God…twelve toppings? I’d like my pizza to have pepperoni, double cheese, black olives, sausage, onions, tomatoes, green olives, er, sauce, did I say double cheese already? Well, then triple it, bitch! I can’t believe Papa John’s doesn’t offer shitaki mushrooms yet. I only eat shitakis. Way to know your clientele, guys. I want to know what happens if they lose and don’t score. You probably get a free breadstick…up your ass! Yes.












So there has to be someone at Papa’s corporate acutally taked with tallying up the touchdowns, doubling that number, and getting the info down to marketing for mass distribution. What does that unfortunate person do the rest of the week? Taste test new crust styles?
Hey, I came up with this new dipping sauce. It’s got some artifical butter and garlic flavoring in it, but mostly all you can taste is the vegetable oil, which is partially hydrogenated. I figure people can dunk their pizza slices in it, in case they need them to be more oily. Slam dunk, right?
Interesting article. Were did you generate all the data from…