See what I did with the headline? That took me seven hours.

From Maryland Basketball: Where Are They Now? comes a report that Eric Hayes has signed to play in Spain, or, as I like to call it, El Pais De Los Suenos. El Lugar Donde Los Suenos Estan Bailando En Las Calles. Ayyyyyyy. Muy bien.

If anyone out there has any Photoshop skills, please put a sombrero on this picture of Eric Hayes and send it back to me. Or, maybe you could add him into the Spanish Olympic team photo where they’re all making Chinese eyes. Thanks.

Eric will play for El Leche Rio Breogan, a team in the second-most-prestigious league in the entire nation. Now that bullfighting may be going the way of a bull after a bullfight, I need a new sport to patronize when I am in La Espana. Looks like I just found one.

Felicidades to Senor Hayes. As we have said many times before, a man can do a lot worse than spending his 20s playing basketball in Europe for six figures. A lot, LOT worse.

(Photo credit: ESPN980.com)

Eric Hayes, looking especially European here, is probably all like, 'not funny, dude.'

Although the phrase “cup of coffee” is used to denote a short stint with a pro league or team, I’m not sure it even applies to Eric Hayes today. In his time with the Washington Wizards, Hayes had more like two Splenda packets and a little container of cream. Now, you wanna sip that slowly, Eric. It is half milk, after all.

Unfortunately, Hayes’ pro career ended before it started. Three days in a minicamp, to be exact. In on Thursday, out on Saturday. Hayes was not on the roster for Washington’s first summer league game against the Los Angeles Clippers (that page is really good, by the way…video highlights and everything). Probably not a shock, given that the Wiz currently have 17 guards under contract. No word on Hayes’ future plans, although they almost certainly include Europe. And as I and many others have said before, a man could do a lot worse.

But going back to the Wiz-Clippers game…Hayes wasn’t on the roster, but guess who was. One Nik Caner-Medley. He finished with a 17 and 4 for the Clips. Say whuhuh? I know, exactly.

Testudo Times has a rundown of other ex-Terps in summer league action, including a fairly listless face-off between Vasquez and Landon Milbourne. Milbourne, who is fighting for an NBA career, netted no points and no boards in three minutes of action. Better get two plane tickets, Eric.

Summer is the cruelest season. If you’re like me, you spend the rest of the year looking forward to the hot-weather months, purely based on the fantasy that this year — THIS year –will surely bring the margarita-fueled windsurfing excursion you’ve always envisioned. Nope. Turns out I still have to go to work. Oh, right, I forgot. All the summer does is make things sweatier. Surf’s up.

The glaring lack of sports on TV doesn’t help things, either. But one thing I’ve discovered in recent years is the NBA summer league. It’s not exactly the Western Conference finals, but it is pro basketball, and does contain the extra drama that can only come when guys are playing for careers in the field of playing sports.

This summer, Greivis Vasquez, Eric Hayes, and Landon Milbourne all made summer league rosters. Vasquez, of course, is on solid ground after being drafted 28th to the Memphis Grizzlies. Hayes and Milbourne, meanwhile, are going to sing for their supper in Washington and Atlanta, respectively, according to a report from Ridiculous Upside. Given Washington’s guard surplus, Hayes may be playing for game tape footage, although given Washington’s penchant for signing ex-Terps, and GM Ernie Grunfeld’s penchant for white-guy guards, I’m not gonna say die just yet. As for Milbourne catching on, that’s a total crapshoot as far as I can tell.

Here are the schedules for each team’s summer league games. Select games will air on NBA TV (noted by asterisk below, or check full schedule here). All games are available through NBA Broadband, although it costs $14.95, so F that. I’ve already circled July 12 on my calendar, when Vasquez’s Grizz collide with Milbourne’s Hawks. The paparazzi are gonna be swarming for that one.

Memphis Grizzlies/Vasquez: 7/12 vs Atlanta, 7/13 vs Milwaukee*, 7/15 vs D-League, 7/16 vs Minnesota*, 7/18 vs San Antonio

Atlanta Hawks/Milbourne: 7/12 vs Memphis, 7/14 vs San Antonio, 7/15 vs Milwaukee, 7/17 vs D-League, 7/18 vs Minnesota

Washington Wizards/Eric Hayes: 7/11 vs Golden State*, 7/12 vs Clippers*, 7/15 vs Dallas*, 7/16 vs New Orleans*, 7/17 vs New York*

I’ll take my payments in cash and my verbal bouquets funky and sloppy.

Seriously, it was a great night for Greivis. He got a great ovation from the notoriously irascible MSG crowd, and capped it all off in classic Vasquez fashion with a big bear hug for David Stern. Congratulations, sir.

Unfortunately Hayes and Milbourne didn’t get picked, but if it’s any consolation it can’t have come as a surprise. Now they have to hope for a training camp invite, and if that doesn’t pan out they’ll just have to be content to travel the world playing for a salary merely in the high five figures.

More coverage and the camera-shaking announcement, reaction, and triumphant stroll to the podium here.

As you know, it is very likely that Greivis Vasquez will hear his name called tonight in Madison Square Garden.  My money is still on Memphis at 28, but plenty of other options are in play. Just yesterday, for example, rumors emerged that the Knicks are trying to move up with the explicit goal of drafting either Vasquez or Iowa forward Craig Brackins. We shall see.

In the meantime, however, fellow Terp standouts and grads Eric Hayes and Landon Milbourne are also (at least technically) on the board tonight. What are their chances?

Well, in a nutshell, they’re not good. But there have been a few nibbles.

Along with the Vaz, both Hayes and Milbourne worked out with the Wizards, although that’s a classic public relations move straight out of the Susan O’Malley playbook. I wouldn’t bank on the Wiz taking them, especially since their last pick is 35 and both would be a reach at that position, plus the fact that the Wiz are looking to move up in the draft, plus the fact that the team is understandably looking at bigs with their later selections. So that’s out.

Thanks to this wonderful, incredible document from NBAdraft.net, we can see that Milbourne has drawn a lot more interest.

Along with the Bullets, Landon has worked out for the Warriors, Clippers, Hawks, Pacers, Pistons, and Timberwolves.

Hayes has been more under the radar than Milbourne, but that doesn’t mean The Steady One isn’t chasing the dream as well. His D.C. workout apparently went pretty swimmingly. He also racked up some extra footage and face time in a workout with the Raptors. Rumored sessions for the Bulls and Pistons don’t seem to have materialized.

Based on this, a draft selection doesn’t seem imminent for either. As we wrote in this space a couple months ago, Milbourne’s pedestrian showing at the Portsmouth Invitational probably sealed his fate. Hayes did not even garner an invitation to that event, which is college basketball’s equivalent of the Senior Bowl.

My prediction is that Milbourne gets a shot to make the Wizards as an undrafted free agent. They can use all the tall guys they can get, and just the fact that they invited Landon and Hayes for workouts means they still see the (financial) value in having a hometown favorite on the roster, just as they did in the O’Malley days when they kick-started the pro careers of other ex-Terps on the draft bubble (Steve Blake, Lonny Baxter and LaRon Profit come to mind).

Hayes will probably not be so lucky. But maybe the D-league is in his future. I would speculate that the NBA will not completely turn its back on someone with the calm demeanor of an Eric Hayes; that’s an increasingly rare commodity in the league and can be important to team chemistry, especially when it comes from the crucial point guard position. His NBA range doesn’t hurt either.

Of course, almost every country in the world has a pro basketball league, so these guys will almost assuredly get paid to play somewhere for some period of time. It’s anyone’s guess what happens tonight — hey, maybe I’ll be wrong. I know I’ll be pulling for all three.

Bullets:

• Give credit where credit is due.  Michigan State lost their best player (Lucas) for most of the game, their top scorer (Summers) was on the bench with foul trouble in the second half, and their second best player (Morgan) lost a tooth, and they never gave in.  In fact, the team seemed to thrive on the adversity.  They shot a lights out 55% FG, including 10/18 3PT.  For a team that is not known for its jump shooting abilities, they brought it today.
• The Terps deserve respect for fighting all they way back, taking a lead, and taking the best the Spartans had to offer without folding.  You will often see a team come back from a double digit deficit in the second half, run out of gas, and fall short.  This team was well conditioned and deep, and they were able to maintain a tight press through the end of the game.  They get an E for effort.  I’d still rather have a W for win.
• If I had to describe this game in one word and that one word couldn’t be heartbreaking, I’d go with “odd”.  On the one hand, every loose ball seemed to be bouncing Michigan State’s way, and they seemed unable to miss at times.  On the other hand, Michigan State was sorely depleted in personnel with injuries and fouls, and it seemed impossible that they were maintaining a lead.  Maryland, on the other hand, played a very good game but was getting beat for most of it.  Then, they turned on the press, forced turnovers, and almost won it.  When was the last time you saw a team win a tournament game with a -12 in takeaways?  There were huge momentum swings.  There was a lot of sloppy ball handling.  Then, there were some incredibly clutch plays at the end of the game.  The end result was an odd game with a great finish.
• The officiating was especially loose.  Michigan State’s frontcourt was jumping on top of Maryland players throughout the game and I don’t remember seeing one over-the-back called.  Maryland was slapping away at Michigan State ball handlers throughout the second half and there was barely a whistle.  33 fouls between the two teams seems pretty low for a game that was this physical.
• After Kansas lost last night I had dreams of a Final Four appearance for Maryland.  Those dreams will not be realized.
• Durrell Summers shot 10/14 FG (6/8 3PT) for 26PTS.  He could not miss.  He was the difference.
• For all the discomfort I felt watching the game at home, Tom Izzo seemed to be in much greater discomfort than me during the later parts of the second half.  With his best players on the bench and his opponent chipping away at his team’s seemingly insurmountable lead, Izzo did not seem to have an answer for Maryland’s press, probably because he didn’t have anyone on the floor that was good at ball handling.  For all the talk about the coaching match-up in this game, it all came down to players making plays, and Michigan State just had one more big play in their bag than Maryland did today.
• Greivis Vasquez had a solid game in his final appearance in a Terps uniform.  The ACC POY had 26PTS/8AST/4RB against a tough defensive ball club.  Goodnight, sweet prince.  You will be missed.
• The other two Maryland seniors also had solid farewell performances.  Eric Hayes ended up with 18PTS/7AST.  Landon Milbourne finished with 11PTS, and he seemed, as always, to be the rock while the rest of the team couldn’t find the basket.  The era of Vasquez, Hayes, and Milbourne ends with the big three playing the game their way.
• The buzzer beating, game winning three pointer by Korie Lucious will be in the One Shining Moment montage.  I will not be watching that montage.

The Terps are out of the tournament.  My bracket looks like a joke.  The tournament field is terribly weak.  I don’t know about you, but I just lost interest in this thing.  Check back with me on Thursday.  For now, goodnight Spokane, Washington, wherever you are.

In T-minus two hours and fourteen minutes (games start at 12:20 p.m. today), March Madness will officially be underway. Spring is here, the tournament’s starting, and it’s the best time of the year, baby. Screw it, meet me at the airport. We’re going to Vegas. I know a place there that will give us money if we win at card games!!!

Although the games start presently, the really important game — the Maryland one — doesn’t start until 9:40 tomorrow. The good news: you won’t miss it because you have to work (assuming you work the day shift). The bad news: well, that’s a long way away. So here are some suggestions for staying occupied in the meantime:

• Throw a one-person ticker tape parade for yourself with the remnants of your FUBAR bracket. Let’s face it: if there was ever a year in which the-administrative-assistant-who-makes-picks-based-on-team-mascots-and-where-her-grandkids-went-to-school is going to win, this is that year. In fact, start a new office pool for who’s going to win the office pool, and then put all your money on Gladys.
• Any leftover Guinness in your fridge?
• Go outside. It’s beautiful outside right now, you pasty desk jockey. Why don’t you go out there? I promise it won’t kill you, you lazy Internet-addicted fuckstick.
• Building on suggestion number three, I haven’t done any yard work in like two years. Could you come over? Sorry I called you a fuckstick before.
• Watch some American Idol reruns. Crystal Bowersox is kind of hot, in like an Altamont kind of way.
• Read this preview of Maryland’s first-round matchup with the Houston Cougars.

So there you go. Plenty to chew on there. Plenty to ponder. Okay, take it easy then! Go Terps!

Oh, right, the preview. So by now, you’re all aware of face-stomping Houston guard Aubrey Coleman. You’re also aware that he was, by a fairly substantial margin, the nation’s leading scorer. The 6′4″ Coleman, who transferred last offseason from Southwest Mississippi Community College, has a lot of street in his game, preferring to slash for layups and mid-range jumpers. This is going to be a difficult, and very interesting, defensive assignment for Greivis Vasquez. I’d like to see Bowie get a shot at him as well.

Either way, Coleman is a killer. But at the same time, he can go cold, and he can also do other things…he demonstrated both these things in winning the Conference USA title game. From what I’ve read, he’s a borderline NBA draft pick at the moment, and a good showing here would improve his stock. You can bet he knows that.

He also thrives in the high-octane system of head coach Tom Penders. Remember him? He coached four pretty unmemorable seasons at nearby George Washington from 1998-2001 (think SirValiant Brown).

According to this recent Post article, Penders was on the hot seat at Houston, too, until their improbable conference title run. So props to them. At 19-15, they’re just delighted to be here.

The team does have other pieces. Senior Guard Kelvin Lewis is their Eric Hayes — solid player, good three-point shooter, and a steady floor leader. Forward Maurice McNeill is their primary post presence and top rebounder.

Still, it clearly begins and ends with Coleman. At 6′9″, Maurice is big, but not prohibitively so. Coleman is the team’s second-leading rebounder. So hopefully — hopefully — the Terps can control the boards with no problem.

When the Terps are on offense, they can and should make Coleman work. Vasquez has a couple inches on Coleman and should be able to get his shot. Now, re-read that sentence and replace “Vasquez” with “Jordan Williams” and “Coleman” with “McNeill.” In general, given that they ranked first in C-USA in steals, I’m guessing Houston plays a frenetic, gambling style of defense. Given that they were second-to-last in in scoring defense and dead last in FG percentage defense and rebounding defense, I’m guessing this style yields mixed results.

Bottom line: Some people saw Coleman lead an exciting conference tourney run and now want to pick the upset based on that momentum and, let’s face it, Maryland’s recent underachievement in the tourney.  But I this is simply a case of one team being better than another. That said, Houston is going to attack. If Maryland comes out with any ACC tourney hangover, we’ll know quickly. Here’s hoping they’ve been getting their rest and drinking plenty of Gatorade. If they have, this should be an easy win.

Now what ever happened to that leftover Guinness we were discussing?

Prediction: Houston 65, Maryland 83

(Photo credit: www.uhcougars.com)

If the Maryland men’s basketball team revealed today that they had X-Ray vision, the strength of 100 men, and a solution for ending gridlock in Congress, wouldn’t you believe them? I would. And not just because of their hard-fought 79-72 win over Duke last night. It’s because there doesn’t seem to be a mountain high enough to stop them right now. Want a buzzer beater? Done. Want two buzzer beaters? Come on, challenge us. Want us to come back from 13 down to win? No problem. Want us to win in one of the toughest gyms in the conference? Boom. Overtime? Check. Double overtime? Double check. And then last night, they coughed up a lead against their most hated rivals — and we’ve all seen that movie before — but kept their composure, kept fighting, and pulled it out on Senior Night. What a win. To the points:

1. FFFFFF***********CK DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUKE!!!!!!!!!!!

 

2. Barring a Roy Jones-level travesty, Greivis Vasquez is ACC player of the year. The D.C. Sports Bog posits that Vasquez’s game-clinching shot — over Jon Scheyer — followed by stopping Scheyer on the other end was the symbolic final nail. Oh, and he also had more points. And assists. And a better FG percentage. And a better FT percentage. And a better three-point percentage. And his team won the game.

 

3. For the record: Vasquez was clutch tonight. He didn’t used to be. He is now. In a way, this makes my A-Rod comparison stronger than ever. After years of struggle and doubt, both men have gotten the monkey off their backs. So there.

 

4. I heard the announcers mention that Maryland would get a share of the regular season title even if both teams win out. Duke would get top seed in the ACC tourney (that’s done by win %), but they would each get a banner (that’s done on records). If someone with more time and inclination on their hands is interested in confirming this, please be my guest. I’ll take Johnny Holiday’s word for it.

 

5. Maryland ran their offense last night very, very effectively. The screens were strong, the cuts were crisp, and most importantly, they forced their transition game and earned plenty of “run-outs,” or as we used to call them, “fast breaks.”

 

6. Duke stifled this during their late-first and second-half comeback by going to a zone. Maryland didn’t attack it.

 

7. Until, that is, a mysterious young man strode onto the court. Man by the name of Bowie. Adrian Bowie. He fearlessly threw himself into the teeth of the zone, slashing it to ribbons. Then he canned a wide-open three. Nine points on four-four shooting. It’s official. This man is Maryland’s X factor until further notice.

 

8. This was a huge victory and all, but was it really the kind of victory you riot in the streets over? Want to storm the court? Go for it. Whatever. But rioting? It’s so easy to picture all the Dookies, arms folded, smirks solidly in place, chuckling over how desperate we are to beat them. I know it’s a free country. And I admit to doing my share of it. But this one reminded me of the 2005 Washington Wizards, who printed T-shirts just for making the playoffs. Just felt a little superfluous is all.

 

9. All the seniors did their thing tonight. Milbourne was fairly quiet (as expected, given Duke’s physical bigs) but hit an early tone-setting three. Eric Hayes was — wait for it –

 

10. ……wait…….for……..it………

 

11. steady. He was very steady.

 

12. The Jordan Williams Bandwagon continues to fill. Fifteen points, 11 boards, great D on Zoubek and the Lord Plumlee Brothers, two clutch free throws in the waning seconds. Another cap feather for the freshman who didn’t make a lot of preseason watch lists. Good luck with Durand Scott there, Andy Katz. Just kidding, Andy. I love you, baby. Text me.

 

13. OK, this was a few more than ten. But hey, it’s deserved. If the Terps take care of business against UVA, they’ll have a banner to hang (supposedly), then a relatively stress-free ACC tourney, and then The Dance. Selection Sunday is 11 days away.

(Photo credit: AP Photo/Nick Wass, former Diamondback photog, via Testudo Times)

Kyle Singler is so ugly that when he cries, the tears turn around and go down the back of his head.

Duke is coming to Comcast Center this evening to renew a rivalry that has been on ice for a few years.  Although the Terps have played the Blue Devils tight through the lean times of the Gilchrist and Caner-Medley Years, there has been a sense that this was not an even match-up for a long while.  Now, the Dukies are so swollen with pride that they claim that Maryland is not their rival.  In fact, this “non-rivalry” is so heated that fans from both sides of the aisle have contested the existence of it with competing edits to the Wikipedia entry on the rivalry.

Tonight, the rivalry is rekindled because there are high stakes involved.  There are implications bigger than one win or loss.  There is more than just pride on the line.  There’s an ACC regular season title at stake.  There is an implication that the winner of this game is the team to beat in the ACC Tournament.  There are tangible rankings, votes, and NCAA Tournament seedings on the line.  There’s bragging rights on the line.  There’s confidence on the line.

The Terps have rattled off five straight wins since their 2/13 loss at Duke.  Maryland has shaken off the stigma of a few early season losses and disrespect in the press to put itself in a position to win the conference.  They’ve shed their pride and just played harder than the rest, and that’s been the difference between mediocrity and success.

In a high stakes game, winning and losing is determined by who blinks first.  Maryland didn’t blink in a last second win against Georgia Tech.  They didn’t blink in 2OT’s against Virginia Tech.  They’re not going to blink against Duke.

Unlike the last go around, the Terps will be hosting the Blue Devils.  During the 2/13 game at Cameron Indoor,  Duke jumped all over Maryland, and it was over as soon as it began.  Maryland couldn’t get over its mistakes and the momentum was too much to overcome.

The Terps are a much better home team than a road team, and Duke will be stripped of its home court advantage.  At Comcast Center, Brian Cro-magnon Zoubek won’t get away with a half dozen over the back fouls.  John Schyer won’t be able to use his left arm to push off without hearing the whistle.  The Cameron Crazies will be watching this game on TV.  Duke is going to have to come into the shell and fight.

At home, on senior night, with everything at stake, Maryland will have the juice to pull it out.  They’ll do it on the back of Greivis Vasquez, a guy that is playing above his head right now.  He’s going to outplay Jon Schyer and show everyone why he’s the ACC Player of the Year.  Schyer vs. Vasquez is the key match-up, and nobody is playing better than Greivis Vasquez right now.  Add to that the fact that Mosley and Hayes have awoken from the slumber they were in during the 2/13 game, and this contest should be a much closer affair than it was three weeks ago.

The Terps are a 1.5PT homedog, and Vegas Sports-Odds feels strongly enough about the Terps that they wrote a feature on why it’s a good idea to put money on them.  My prediction: Maryland wins 74-73.

Congratulations to Greivis Vasquez, Landon Milbourne, and Eric Hayes on your great college careers.  Go Terps.

(This is the second of a three-part series. Read the first part here.)

Let’s play a quick game of word association, if you’ll indulge me. What’s the first word that comes to mind when I say….”Eric Hayes.” OK, I’ve got mine: steady. It just came to me. Never mind that Googling “steady Eric Hayes” brings up 17 pages of hits. My idea! “Steady” Hayes is the steadiest steady to ever steady the stead. And that’s steadying something.

And you know what else they say, about lazy, shopworn cliches? They got that way for a reason. Over the years, Eric Hayes has been very steady with his play. Very calming. Very matoor. If Vasquez is the lightning rod, Hayes is the…lightning? Clouds? I don’t know. But it’s clear that Hayes provides a critical psychological counterweight for this group and is an indispensible component of what has become a very good team. He’s not flashy, but he grows on you like a fungus. The good kind of fungus. So there you go. If Vasquez is the lightning rod, Hayes is porcini mushrooms. This is why they give me the big checks.

Of the three seniors, Hayes has probably been the least impressive from a statistical standpoint. He’s not a great scorer, but developed a more consistent three pointer over last offseason that has opened things up for the others this year. According to the great Terrapin Stats, Hayes ranks fourth on the school’s all-time assists chart with 491. He’s a lock to get to 500, which is impressive no matter who you are. But it puts him 253 behind running mate Vasquez, who is more of a shooting guard but nevertheless led the team in assists last year and is doing so again this year, notching 6.4 assists to Eric’s 3.9. For the record, Hayes is also 481 dimes behind Steve Blake, the school’s all-time assists leader (not to mention fifth in NCAA history) and the player Hayes is most compared to.

That, by the way, is a comparison I always found a little thin. I believe it was (and is) more a combination of physical resemblance and wishful thinking, rather than pure talent, that led to that corrolary. It’s not really fair to either guy. But of course, a real similarity does exist in general demeanor. I’ve seen both men play live many times, and as I noted in last week’s Clemson recap, Hayes, just like Blake, plays the role of quiet floor leader — but a leader nonetheless. During timeouts, Vasquez is high-fiving teammates, putting his arm around guys, yelling motivational slogans at their noses, pumping up the crowd, arguing with Gary Williams about which set to run, schmoozing the refs, cooking omelettes, getting girls’ phone numbers, and mopping the floor (seriously). Hayes takes, shall we say, a bit of a more targeted approach. He finds the guys who need a lift. He pats them on the backside, nods and gives them a little grin, and just says “let’s go, man!” I get the feeling that if a player wants to talk, or whatever, they go to Eric Hayes.

He also might be the most cerebral of the three seniors. Whenever I read an article, I look for Eric’s comments, which are candid without being overemotional, analytical without being rote or patronizing. That’s the way he plays, too. Perhaps one day, that’s the way he’ll coach.

Back on the court, it’s hard to pinpoint his biggest few performances by looking at stat sheets. But you really don’t have to look far to find a prime candidate. In last Saturday’s double OT win over Virginia Tech, Hayes had 10 points and 12 assists, and hit a long jumper to put the Terps up by two with 5.2 seconds left in regulation. He has struggled at times, particularly on the road. But for each bad game, there’s two others where he just quietly stirs the drink, like last season’s tournament-clinching win at Wake Forest, when he netted 11 points and 3 assists. He’s steady, is what I’m saying.

I don’t know if Hayes wants to coach or not, but I think he could do it. Either way, he’ll be one of those guys for whom money will never be good inside the boundaries of Terp nation. Especially if this team makes a good run in the postseason. We shall see.

No matter what happens, we’ll always have the haircuts.